|
the expression I don't like at all |
Babies do try one's patience.No matter how much you promise that you won't freak
out, more than half the times, you do fly off handle.When I was new to all this I used
to, even, give way to tears.
Therefore,when I heard the D-word(discipline),I was so scared.I mean my boy is as
stubborn as they come ,how on earth was I going to I manage it.
My son literally drives me crazy at times.So, I did some research and hard thinking on
how to discipline and control him.
|
My boy throwing a tantrum.(google images) |
Now, whenever we(my son and I) have a clash of wills or he is giving me a hard
time,I just grit my teeth and repeat this mantra in my head...
WHO'S THE PARENT...I AM.
WHO CAN CONTROL ANGER...I CAN
WHO WILL MANAGE ALL THE CRISES ...I WILL.
This helps me calm down .Makes me feel in charge of the situation.
Then I get down to his level.Literally get down on my knees, and listen to what he is
saying.
If its a smallie(like wanting a toy,wanting to play,not wanting to sleep in the
cot,wanting a sweet etc),I let him have his way.If its a biggie(want to play when I have
to work,want to go out when we cant),I try to reason while trying to distract him all
along.It has worked and is still working.
|
Find your baby's reset button |
There are actually two successful ways of managing a tantrum...
Time out:
Remove your baby from the scene and go to a calmer place.If you are outdoors go to
washroom,or go sit in your car.When he/she calms down,talk.Tell him what happened
was wrong and should not happen again.Keep up the practice even if you think its not
working.Gradually,baby will get the message that every time he misbehaves ,he will
not get what he wants and will have to leave.
Naughty chair is a good teaching tool and babies as small as 1 year get the concept.for
each year of baby's age ,there is one minute of time out.You can use a room as time
out are as well.The purpose is not to let the baby remain in the environment which
caused tantrum or where it started..
Time in:
Get down to baby's level and talk calmly.Hold the baby close.By doing this you are
giving her a message, that you are there for her and it is okay and she can trust you.The
feeling that situation is under control and mama is there, calms the baby down
Intellegent use of both the techniques gets amazing results.
Just don't give in when the baby cries.Decide beforehand,if you want to give him/her
their wish or not.Then stick to it.While it is unfair to fight over smallies,it is equally
spoiling to surrender to a tantrum in case of a biggie.
As a rule ,its healthier to have time in's more then time out.
Anger is a negative emotion.When baby throws tantrum ,it gets out of control even for
the child which makes it frustrating for him/her , hence more tantrum follows.
Be patient,talk in level voice (even if you want to hit him/her).You will able to control
the situation, if you are in control of yourself.
If you don't feel like it,its perfectly understandable.Just let your spouse take
over.Leave the room and calm yourself down.Don't hit or shake the baby.
The important thing to realize is that your baby has no control over his/her life and
maybe anger/tantrum is his/her way of letting you know about something.DO take
some time and listen to your baby, because they are the most important part of your
life, and you are their anchor and support system.
|
google images |
Good luck with tantrum management.and do share how you manage your moody baby?
That's amazing I am going to learn your mantra by heart now... will try all this hope it works and I can shop in peace:) thanks allot:)
ReplyDeletev nice indeed
ReplyDelete